It Will Always Get Better, I Swear.

I've been bedridden except for therapy trips and doctors appointments for over a month now. I'm not 100%, but I'm fighting to be. I spoke with my boss today and someone I worked with closely had taken his own life whilst I've been out on disability.

I know things can get closed in on you. I've experienced that feeling of the world folding in on you. You have to grab a rope, a life preserver.It's not something that you should figure out when the shit hits the fan. My advice is to figure it out in case of emergency. Put it away for a rainy day. You never know what life will hand you. We plan for so much, but figuring out an emotional exit strategy is something I never hear talked about, until it's almost defcon 4.

I write. I make things if I have the energy. I love my dogs. I look for ways to get better, or do exercises that physically will improve my condition. I'm learning to ask for help. I'm learning to not stress out over things I cannot control. Sure I get angry, sure I implode/ explode, and sure I despair. That's when when my pre-planned exit strategy comes in, rather than checking out. There's a great Tedx Talk that I saw that totally had a hand to forehead, light bulb moment for me when I was in a lonely, dark place. There's more to the premise of adding time to your life, as the topic states, so I recommend watching this episode in it's entirety.

Like I said. It will always get better, maybe not the same, but it will get better. I swear.

XOXO

Hope